Wednesday, November 18, 2009

Time to Get Real

It is time to get real folks.
I'm really fat.

Has this ever happened to you?
You look at a picture of yourself and think, "Wow, that outfit made me look really fat."
Then you see another picture of yourself and think, "That outfit too?"
Pretty soon you curse every outfit you own for making you look fat.
Slowly, the harsh reality sets in . . .

Hello!!!!!!
Your fat is making you look FAT.
It isn't the poor outfit's fault.

Wow, that's a lot harder of a problem to solve then just getting new clothes.
Ah man!

I tend to pork up while I'm pregnant.
With Megan, I gained about 75 pounds.
Is that even possible to do in 9 months? Yes, cause I did it.
With Brendan, I gained about 60 with a lot of it piling on in the end when I gave up caring.
(P.S. Don't ever give up caring!)
I didn't eat unhealthy foods.
I just ate WAY TOO MUCH of healthy foods
(well, I guess a few unhealthy foods too.)

Imagine my surprise when I didn't give birth to a 60 pound baby!
What? Nine pounds, two ounces? What about the rest?
Needless to say, folks, I am left with 40 pounds of excess baby weight.

I am embarrassed to write that.

The other night I was sworn in for my second term on city council.
I had to stand up in front of a room full of people and take an oath.
I should have felt proud of myself for being willing to serve my community.
I should have been proud of the work I've done so far.
Instead I wanted to crawl in a hole and hide myself.
I didn't just feel fat on the outside.
I felt fat on the inside.

Anyone who has ever suffered with a weight problem knows exactly what I'm talking about.
You plump up and all of a sudden you feel less outgoing, less confident, less willing to put yourself out there. Do you know what I mean?

I know how I look shouldn't play such a huge role in how I feel.
But it does.

That was my final straw.

I lost 60 pounds after Megan was born.
I can do this again.

I need your help to keep me honest and on track.

I hereby declare every Wednesday to be "Weight Watcher Wednesday."
I will post how much weight I've lost the week prior, along with any new tips, recipes, etc. I've come across to help me along the way. I'll also tell you how much I've exercised.

You can join me if you want to. Just leave me a comment each week updating me on your progress too. We can help motivate each other.

But even if I have to do this alone, I'm still doing it.

I want to be that outgoing, confident person that takes chances inife without being preoccupied with the shame I feel on the inside for neglecting my body.

My body is awesome. It has brought two children into the world. It is time to take care of it a little better.

Here goes, folks!

6 comments:

Melissa said...

Im in the middle of trying to lose weight too! I use a lot of the south beach recipes and they are really good! Im the same way, if i feel fat it changes my whole outlook on life. I want to stay in the house in pjs! Good luck girl!

One Cluttered Brain said...

I started walking on my treadmill EVERY day for about a month. Then Nanowrimo started and I haven't gotten BACK on the treadmill. I need to eat healthier. I need to lose some weight. Let's do it together. I'll cheer for ya! YEAH! We can do better and lost that weight! If Mama Nut can do it, so can we! YEAH!

Lisa said...

Girl! I'll do it with you! I am pretty fluffy and could use the accoutability!

Our Family said...

Our Emma will be 1 year in December and I kept thinking that the weight would some how just disapper by itself because I was never naturally a heavy person. Imagine my surprise when I realized she'll be a year and I have 25 lbs to lose. I'm with you tell me what to do.

Alyssa said...

I'm due on 12/28 and I can't wait to start weight watchers again! I too have gained more than the recommended "25-35lbs". At least you ate a lot of healthy foods, I'm worried my little man will come out as a Taco Bell Double Decker Taco. :( Good luck on your weight loss journey - WW really works great!

Mach Momma said...

I am sooo with you. It's hard to go anywhere when you feel like that and you just described me!