The Grass Is Always Greener . . .

Today Megan looked at me after I got out of the shower and said,

"Momma, how can I get my boo boos to look like yours?"

Interesting question. Well, Ms. Megan, here is how you get your boo boos to look like mine. First, you need to get pregnant, gain 70 pounds, watch your boo boos grow to inhuman proportions, have the baby, nurse the baby, watch those they-can't-possibly-get-any-bigger boo boos get even bigger, stop nursing, lose the 70 pounds, watch the boo boos deflate like old balloons, turn 35, get pregnant again, gain 50 pounds, watch your boo boos grow to inhuman proportions, have the baby, nurse the baby, watch those they-can't possibly-get-any-bigger boo boos get even bigger, stop nursing, lose 35 pounds (still workin' on the rest), watch the boo boos deflate like old balloons again, and get ready to turn 36. That, Ms. Megan, is how you get your boo boos to look like mine. Thanks for asking.

P.S. Thank me later for not including a photo with this post :)