Tuesday, November 27, 2012

The Elf on Our Shelf

 You have heard of the new, spectacular Christmas phenomenon
known as the Elf on the Shelf . . . right?
 
You haven't?
 
Stop it.
Stop. It. Right. Now

 You can buy an Elf on the Shelf at your local bookstore.  In the box, you get an adorable little elf and a book to read to your children about how tough it is for Santa to determine who is naughty or nice.  Santa needs the help of scout elves to help him keep an eye out, as the book describes.  Once the children give the elf a name, he receives his "magic" . . . enabling him to fly to the North Pole every night to give Santa a behavior report.  He then flies back before the children wake up in the morning to observe another day.
 
Of course, I convinced John we had to buy one and of course, he did.  We read the story to the kids and they named our elf "Sunshine Jingle."  Then . . .the magic started . . .and the good behavior began.  
 
Now, at the mere hint of a problem, all I have to do is say "ELF!" and suddenly . . . magically . . . the situation resolves before Santa has to hear about it. 
 
I feel the author of this book should be awarded the Nobel prize for her gift to humanity. 
 
I am going to say that again.
 
I feel the author of this book should be awarded the Nobel prize for her gift to humanity.
 
Her brilliance is a rare gift.  Parents everywhere are making her rich . . . as they should be.
 
Now, it is not good enough to just hide the elf somewhere in the house for the children to find in the morning.  Oh no! No no no!!!  You need ideas of creative things the elf can be doing, like chillin' with Barbie in the hot tub or parachuting over the bannister. 
 
Seriously not joking. 
 
 There are whole blogs dedicated to creative elf ideas.  Many of them.  Overeager parents everywhere are just giddy with excitement (me included.)

 See what I mean?
 

Then these parents post pictures of what their elf is doing on the internet for everyone to enjoy.  I did not take the above picture but I wish I had.  That is hysterical.

I said it before and I'll say it again . . .

I feel the author of this book should be awarded a Nobel prize for her gift to humanity.




 Not to be outdone by random parents I don't know on the internet, I created my own little fun for our elf.
 


The kids were beyond excited to find Sunshine playing Candyland with Elmo and the stuffed dog.  I was beyond excited to enjoy their good behavior all day.

The next night it was John's turn to help the elf find a resting spot.  He decided a nice perch up high in the wreath in the family room would give Sunshine a nice vantage point.  It was awesome!  He could see everything from up there!

Tonight, I took our elf manipulation to the next level.  I did something so dripping with evil brilliance, if they awarded a Nobel prize for the best Elf on the Shelf idea, I think I might have it in the bag.

 
That is Sunshine . . . in the bathroom . . .  on the doll house toilet with a newspaper under his arm . . . holding a sign that says "Santa wants Brendan to pee pee in the potty.  I do too.  Love, Sunshine"
 
Shoot, if I can't get Brendan to cooperate with potty training, I'll bet Sunshine can. 
 
Stay tuned for Sunshine's new adventures.  I have a feeling he is going to have some around here.  

Saturday, November 17, 2012

A Frosty Halloween

 Halloween is kinda a big deal around here.  We celebrate for a week straight because Halloween has everything a good holiday should have - chocolate, family fun, and chocolate.  Oh yeah, and lots of opportunities to wow your kids with pancake batter. 

 Every year we have a pumpkin carving contest and every year I tell you how amazing it is that Megan carves her own pumpkin, start to finish, without any help . . .  and every year, you are impressed.  Right?
 Right.  You are totally impressed.  John and I both carved pumpkins too but you'll have to take my word for it.  We were too busy marveling at Megan's pumpkin (that truly belongs in the Guggenheim)to take pics of our own. 
 
 This year, instead of going to the city's Halloween party (and freezing our butts off outside), we opted to go to a different event called "Haunt the Halls" at the local high school.  They had classrooms decorated and the kids got to trick or treat around the building.  It had one major thing going for it . . . it was inside.  Usually I am the one dragging everyone to the city party but this year I just didn't have it in me.  I guess I'm getting old but standing outside for hours in cold, windy drizzle just didn't sound appealing.  Not even for a free hot dog.  Not even for a smore.  Not even for a free pumpkin.  John looked at me and said, "It's like I don't even know you anymore."  Yes, John, this year I dressed up as someone who enjoys warm Halloweens.
  
 Now, let me explain the costumes.  Megan was Dorothy because her friend Jordis suggested Megan had the right hair to be Dorothy and Megan felt she had to take that responsibility seriously.  My mom made the costume and Megan couldn't have been any more excited to wear it.

Brendan, on the other hand, chose his own costume.  I take no responsibility.  He said, "I wanna be a hot dog.  I love hot dogs."  I didn't even think there was a such thing as a hot dog costume but . . . the internet is a magical thing.  You know, looking back I am glad I let him choose his own costume.  He totally rocked that hot dog.  He said he wants to be the Statue of Liberty or a pineapple next year.  Speechless.

 This is what fun looks like.
 
 See, my kid wasn't the only one dressed up as junk food for Halloween!

 A few days later it was time for trick or treat.  It was still freezing.  It was still raining.  I was still less than excited about going outside.  I wanted to stay home under an electric blanket . . . but I didn't.  (I think this totally earned me breakfast in bed on Mother's Day, by the way.)


 Jordis, aka the Wicked Witch of the West, came in to get warmed up as she made it through the neighborhood.
So did our friends Lauren and Evan.   
 
At the end of the night, we all finally got under the electric blanket and ate and ate and ate . . .  because all good holidays include chocolate, family fun, and chocolate.